It isn’t. If nations had honest taglines based on their socio-cultural development in the modern times, India’s would have been “Marital Rape? Cool. Pre-Marital Loss of Virginity? FUCK NO.” because it would honestly describe how far we have come in all these years when it comes to sexuality, taboos and in strict senses of sexual freedom, gender equality too.
I think these gender-specific shackles of virginity are grossly unjust towards women. I’m not exactly an advocate of women’s rights (which I hope you wouldn’t misconstrue as “I yell at my girlfriend in public for expressing her political views”) and yet, when a mere outsider, a non-advocate feels the need to so much as speak about it with a certain amount of critical rage, I think the message about how gross it is should be visible in considerable magnification. When it comes to bare sexuality and especially virginity, we are still an orthodox lot, not just as India, but as the whole world. Let me explain this to you with the power of your own vision. When I say “A Virgin”, what do you see? I see a beautiful, 20-year-old young girl in white robes, honestly. And I am dead sure you see something similar if not vaginas, although some may go as far as seeing that. I don’t blame you, it is how we have been growing up – reading, listening and talking about it. But say, on listening to the word Virgin, does anyone see uncircumcised dicks? Or any kind of dicks? Heck does anyone even see a handsome man in white robes?
Now further, the assertion is also based on the fact that you would religiously remember a virgin woman with the adjective stuck to her name, thus kind of emphasizing that her virginity was the most important thing about her life. Other words, Virgin Mary. Why cannot she just be Mary, the mother of Jesus? Okay she gave birth to a child with the supposed interference of a Holy Spirit and no man was involved in the act (remember that Anakin Skywalker was also born the same way but no one called his mother Virgin Shmi), but just to remind the world that this birth was magical, why couple the mother’s name with a permanent adjective which she probably regrets anyway? I mean, we all want sex right? And if there was such a pushing necessity to emphasize on the fact that Jesus was no ordinary, why couldn’t you say Biologically Fatherless Jesus or Jesus The Magically Born? It even has a nice ring to it. While saying all this, I also want you to remember that this isn’t a mindless rant in a sudden fit of feminism. I am strictly talking about our obsession with virginity. Every culture, every civilization, every religion underlines some importance or necessity of virginity. Some religion wants the blood of virgin women, some cultures like those of the Greeks asked for virgin women, who could be messengers of the Gods in ancient times, and some others like the Indian culture ask women to stay virgins in their youths because it is chaste, which apparently also means that God likes it. I don’t see how is God always involved. Does it mean He can smell dick and is repelled by it? No? That hurts your religious sentiments?
I don’t know how it is where you stay but in India where I stay, there is this thing called an arranged marriage, which you have probably heard of. In this system, parents sit over cups of tea and decide who can nail their children for the rest of the children’s lives based on the nailing-enthusiast’s family’s social status. In this arrangement if a girl candidly admits to having had a sexual intercourse in the past, the guy’s set of parents can go as far as asking the girl’s set of parents something that can well be translated to what you would ask the cashier at Walmart when you go home and see that the seal of the pack of cookies you bought is already broken. If it can be any more blunt, you would say “Look at your nerve! You tried selling me an already opened and used commodity?!”
Yes, they take virginity that seriously. The depth of this problem is so grave; it needs to be measured in time rather than any other unit. When I think of it, I guess this system of praising virgin women, linking them with chastity and promotion of virginity until marriage was all done in ancient times so that people would not fuck around like animals and the institution of marriage would be saved, which was really a wise way of doing it because it went on to become successful. It was like saying, “Hey daughter, you can go fuck Ed in the neighbourhood and lose your virginity, no problem because I’m a modern 7thcentury BC, open minded dad, but God can smell dick and he don’t like it. What you gon’ do about that, huh?” But then, I guess some forefather mistakenly fucked some fore-aunt in the dark (can’t blame him, he lived in a 7th century B.C. joint family and there was no Tesla to invent the bulb) and the product of incest created all the dumb shit crowd in the middle years which believed in stuff like monkeys believe in, well, stuff. But I think it’s all changing because in the last couple of centuries we have fucked as outside of our families as possible and also because if I can understand this much, which is so little really, there must be brighter fucks out there who can and would certainly know better.
This all goes to say, of course don’t fuck around and destroy the institution of marriage but don’t make a fucking demon out of virginity. It is not important at all. Just something your body is meant to lose some random day. It is in fact not even more important than something as small the mobile phone in which you’re reading this. How? Here’s how: What would you prefer losing more when you wake up tomorrow morning? This phone or your virginity?
That there, is your answer.
PS: When I thought about where did all this come from, I realized it was because 51-year-old Salman Khan said “I am still a virgin”, on a talk show. It angered me to see how he was keeping up with the taboo, promoting it. If it’s true that he’s a virgin, he has literally lived this cartoon. Fucking dick.