For those of you who don’t know, this what this is about, it’s nothing related to my life’s awakening prior to which I was doing some really fucked up job. Or it is. But it is also about what was I doing all this time when I was away from the blog.
So let’s see, this hasn’t really been a hiatus or a sabbatical or whatever I would otherwise call my time spent rubbing the sweat on my ass until it turns to a mound of dirt. Literally. I guess that’s how the word rubbish came into existence. You see it’s because of rubbing something that is originally liquid and turns to many semi-solid pellets when you keep rubbing it for a while. So since we don’t really know how to define things that are incomprehensible but do exist, we found the idea of putting an -ish after them. However since the motive of this article isn’t lighting upon obvious facts that you don’t know because you don’t rub the sweat on your ass, I think I’d move on. When I come to think about what really is the motive of this article, I realize that there’s nothing particular I want to speak of. Perhaps this is just one really desperate attempt to get started because I have spent a lot of time not writing. There were times when I saw something or happened to be in a situation and thought “Hey that can go on the blog!” but then I was also obligated to devote my time to typing product descriptions for Amazon and Snapdeal. One time I wrote 37 descriptions of 200 words each, save the calculations 7400 words in all about what? Toilet seats. That kind of work burns your brains like acids burn, well I am not very well-versed with chemistry but you get the idea right?
Funny how I now realize that even getting to work in your favorite (I hate the fact that when I type favourite this WordPress editor puts a red line under it) field is not always as rewarding as it may seem to someone who is not you. People always tell me that I am a lucky bastard because I am getting to work in the writing industry like I always wanted to and I want to tell them that this was not what I was looking forward to but then too much complaining makes you sound like a cunt. Of course I am placed with a good company now where my work primarily consists of sipping free coffee and typing words in the computer whenever I feel like, which is good because it gives me a lot of time to follow up people’s lives on Facebook and see how they are getting married or getting jobs or just doing something that is better than sitting and drinking free coffee. However my days with the product descriptions were really unpleasant. Then again, I guess more or less, that’s how it begins for every person. And since I am almost over that phase, I thought it would be a good idea to go back to what I really love to do – write this blog. For most of the times, I have been pretty mean with all the words and glorious abuses (this editor just did it again with humour) towards you, but I would really love to try and do something different this time around.
I know what you’re thinking but for once, I am not going to be a fucking jerk and make some really inappropriate remark because if you come and see me in person you will also see that I don’t use penis-metaphors all that often. That would be fucking crazy which reminds me, I do use the word fucking as much as you would use the loo if someone turns the AC to 18 degree Celsius and makes you sit in that room for nine hours (describing my office, nothing personal). So yes, without being abusive of the fine person that you are – something I otherwise love to do, I’d like you to know that I am here now, and I am going to try and write again and this time, I am going to be a little nicer.
No, I am really not going to say “Fuck off.”
Okay, fuck off.